


Palpitations

by NowYoCandysGone



Series: It's not Grey's Anatomy (but it kind-of is) Hospital AU [2]
Category: Fire Emblem Series, Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Alternate Universe - Hospital, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Best Friends, Byleth is not good with self care, Claude is the ultimate wingman, Claumitri, Depression, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Grief/Mourning, M/M, Meeting the Parents, Mental Health Issues, References to Depression, Setleth, Strong Language, Triggers, Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms, cell screenshots, dimiclaude, direct sequel to house of 9, text conversations
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-15
Updated: 2020-01-26
Packaged: 2021-02-27 04:53:38
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 2
Words: 12,453
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22261369
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NowYoCandysGone/pseuds/NowYoCandysGone
Summary: With some well placed advice from Dimitri and Claude, Byleth enters her first serious romantic relationship. After a few months, it's time for Seteth to meet her father.
Relationships: Dimitri Alexandre Blaiddyd/Claude von Riegan, My Unit | Byleth & Seteth, My Unit | Byleth/Seteth
Series: It's not Grey's Anatomy (but it kind-of is) Hospital AU [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1602433
Comments: 40
Kudos: 98





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> A Special thanks to TygerRises for beta-ing this fic for me and RPing out some of the text conversations. It was a lot of fun to write Byleth's feelings and to elaborate more on this world we have created. 
> 
> A VERY Special thanks to BeastPrince for the WONDERFUL AMAZING AWESOME art that made this first chapter just so unique and personal. Claude is a dork and I love him and the image is my phone background now. Y'all will understand when you reach that part.
> 
> Please give them both some love, they are so helpful and wonderful, and this fic wouldn't have been possible without them. Thank you guys, I love you so so much and this fic is dedicated to you.

Byleth Eisner had not been in a romantic relationship since she was in college. If she were to look back on it with the shrewd, critical eye she'd developed as a Physician's Assistant, Byleth didn't even know if what she had with Claude Von Riegan was a _relationship_ at all. 

They had both been sleep-deprived med students at the time, after all. They didn't go out on dates, because they didn't have time. More often than not, they would end up meeting in Claude's apartment to study for a few hours, maybe put on a movie, and then completely ignore it in favor of a quick fuck to let out all of the stress that had been building up during the week. If anything, what she and Claude had shared was nothing more than a purely casual "Friends With Benefits" set up. 

At the time, that had been what Byleth needed. She didn't need some doting, needy, boyfriend who wouldn't understand just how much stress she was truly under. She just needed someone who could make her come. Even after her graduation, that's what she needed more than anything. Reality was more stressful than med school, and sometimes she just needed a good fuck.

Claude had been there to oblige this need at first. It was convenient for them as neighbors. They had a "Don't ask, Don't tell" policy that worked great for their trysts. As a newly graduated PA, Byleth didn't need anything more. It worked great...until Claude met Dimitri a few weeks later.

She wasn't mad or upset at the new development. She could see that Claude's needs had changed, unlike hers. He needed the support and love and all of the gooey _relationship_ stuff that Dimitri was more than willing to provide. Things that Byleth had never been, nor would ever be willing to provide. She loved Claude with all of her heart, which is why she let Dimitri fill the hole in his heart that she didn't quite fit into.

She really, _really_ didn't mind. Although, seeing her best friend and his boyfriend together gnawed at her insides. She was 28 years old and as single as could be. Byleth was invested in her career, not in having a relationship. Or so she told herself. Career first, sex later. 

That all went out the window very quickly.

Sleeping with her boss had never been a part of her plan. Not that she had a plan to begin with, but sleeping with Dr. Assal was definitely not part of it. She didn't regret it, or so she told Claude. She felt things with Seteth that she had never felt with anyone else. He was a passionate lover, one who liked control as much as she did. It certainly made for unforgettable interactions. 

They had rendezvoused seven times and counting now. All of them were in various places around her townhouse, all of them while his daughter, Flayn, was otherwise occupied with friends, hockey practice, or spending time with one of her uncles. All of their trysts had been nothing short of mind-blowing for Byleth. She didn't _want_ to get attached, but each time they met up, she felt herself becoming more and more so. She found herself looking for excuses to call or text Seteth, even though he outright told her that she could contact him whenever she pleased. The hardest part of the whole situation was that they had to keep it a secret. She loved the urgency and the passion that came from having a secret lover, but she also knew that Claude couldn't keep his mouth shut to save his life. It would get out eventually, and that scared the shit out of Byleth. 

"May I speak with you in private, Byleth?" Dr. Assal poked his head around the corner of his pod. He had taken to calling her by her first name when it was just the two of them. The floor was quiet, only one patient in Bed 6 at the moment, and they were sleeping. The PA nodded and closed the window she was looking at on her monitor, then stood and walked over to the door of Seteth's small office. 

"Is everything okay, Dr. Assal?" Seteth nodded. 

"Everything is fine. Could you close the door, please?" Byleth did as she was told, then took to leaning against the wall. The entire space was somewhat cramped, but she made do. 

"So uh...what's going on?" She was genuinely curious, as she was reasonably sure that she had not done anything wrong...recently. Seteth turned his computer monitor to face her. 

"I wanted to let you know that I am submitting a request for a meeting to HR regarding our... relationship. While interoffice relationships are not grounds for termination, it could be seen as an issue if it were to get out that you and I have been…"

"Sleeping together?" Byleth finished for him. Seteth cleared his throat. 

"Yes. That is why if the information is to be released, I would like it to come from us. I just wanted to let you know, as well as going over our game plan for the meeting." Byleth frowned but nodded after a few moments. Seteth turned his monitor back around and typed something quickly before turning his attention back to Byleth.

"I've never had to have an HR meeting about something like this before," Byleth admitted. "Frankly, I don't know what to expect."

"Well, I was reviewing the hospital's policies on relationships in the workplace, and what we have done is certainly frowned upon. If people were misinformed, it could be catastrophic for our careers." 

"Then let's see to it that HR is not misinformed," Byleth said. She certainly did not want to be known in the medical field as someone who slept with the higher-ups for personal gain. The only benefit she had acquired from it was a sexual partner who knew what he was doing. 

"We are going to need to define our relationship for HR in the meeting, so I figured now was as good a time as any to ask if you'd like to date me in a more...exclusive capacity." Byleth blinked. Once, twice. 

"You...you want me to be your girlfriend?"

"It seems like the next logical step. You have met with my daughter multiple times, we have engaged in intimate behaviors, and I must admit that I…" Seteth paused to clear his throat. "I have developed romantic feelings for you. I would like to do this right. Perhaps we could go on a date in public." 

Byleth's heart hammered hard in her chest, threatening to burst out of her and onto the floor. She had not expected Dr. Assal to catch feelings for her, let alone ask her to be with him exclusively. She was not the type to _date_. She liked the no-strings-attached nature of their relationship. Seteth was trying to attach some strings. He was a traditional man, wanting to do things right, and he was smart not to blindside Byleth in their upcoming HR meeting.

"Set...I don't know what to say…" Seteth's eyes lit up. This _really_ wasn't her thing. And seeing him waiting for a response like an excited puppy wasn't helping. 

"Is it a yes?"

"It's neither a yes or a no. _For now_. May I have some time to think it over?" The excitement in Seteth's face faded almost as quickly as it had arrived. He turned away, an embarrassed blush appearing on his cheeks. Quickly regaining his composure, he turned back to Byleth.

"Yes, of course. I do not want to force you or make you uncomfortable. Take all the time you need. I will refrain from sending the email until you decide." Byleth nodded and stepped forward, taking Seteth's hand and squeezing it reassuringly. She then opened the door and exited the pod, returning to her desk.

She checked for any lights from the beds, making sure that no one needed her. Then she sunk back into her chair with a long sigh. Rubbing her hand down her face, she pulled out her phone and texted Claude.

Byleth stared at her phone for what felt like thirty minutes. She read back through her conversation with Claude at least four times, if not more, trying to process his 'advice.' He was right, of course. Despite being a cheeky asshole, Claude was right a lot of the time when it came to feelings and relationships. He was significantly more adept with such things. She supposed that was how he and Dimitri had maintained a successful relationship for so long.

She didn't _want_ to end things with Dr. Assal by any means. She didn't want to be tied down with no way to escape should she need a way out. If she agreed to his offer, she would be his _girlfriend._ The word burned on her tongue. Or perhaps that was the coffee she had just sipped on. Maybe she could discuss proper labels with him, ones that promote equality in the relationship. 

Was she seriously considering saying yes? Byleth shook her head and set her coffee cup aside. Perhaps she should make a pro and cons list or something of that nature.

Byleth didn't have much time to reflect further on the matter, as the alert light for Bed 6 turned on. Standing from the desk, she made her way over to the waiting patient to assist him.

\---

The remaining six hours of her shift were spent not thinking about her future response to Seteth. Instead, it was spent attending to a patient who came in around 4:30 with severe stomach pain. Dr. Assal graciously assisted with the diagnosis (kidney stones, as was later discovered via ultrasound). They spoke politely with each other but did not make eye contact more than once or twice, and certainly did not banter in the way they had become accustomed to on the night shift. All in all, it was far too awkward for Byleth's taste. She would have to rectify that.

Once the patient was hooked up to an IV to assist with the pain and was sleeping while the medicine did its work, Byleth returned to her desk at last. Waiting for her was a notification of a message from Dimitri. Confused but relieved, Byleth unlocked her phone to reply.

  


Byleth leaned back in her chair and clicked the home button on her phone to reveal the picture she had set as her wallpaper and smiled. She had taken it on one of her game nights with Claude and Dimitri. Claude was sitting next to her while Dimitri was across the table. She'd snapped the selfie of her and Claude after winning a particularly long game of Monopoly. Claude wore a cheesy grin on his face and had two fingers up behind her head, making bunny ears. Dimitri was in the background laughing behind his hand. Byleth had found out shortly after taking the picture that the bunny ears had been the reason why Dimitri was laughing.

Her two best friends. Soon to be engaged best friends, if Dimitri didn't chicken out. As scary as it was... _she_ wanted that. She wanted what Claude and Dimitri had. Her gaze wandered to Dr. Assal. He was back in his pod, typing away on his computer. His gaze lifted, and they made eye contact through the open door. Byleth gave him a small smile.

She clocked out at 9:05 AM, following a check-in with Dr. Seiros and one of the daytime nurses. After collecting her things and waving goodbye to them, Byleth made her way out to wait by Seteth's car. She had spotted him talking to Dr. Seiros, so he would be a few moments at least.

After several minutes, Seteth emerged from the ER back entrance. Upon seeing Byleth, he approached her. His expression gave away no prevalent emotion. 

"Something about this seems familiar…" he teased. Byleth cracked a smile, but it faded quickly. "By, is everything okay?" Byleth opened her mouth to reply, but her phone buzzed in her pocket. She promptly pulled it out and was greeted by a notification of a message from Claude.

Byleth's grin returned, and she quickly tapped out her reply before shoving her phone back in her pocket. She then regarded Seteth, who was waiting patiently for her.

"Yes. Everything is fine. I gave it some thought, and I would like to date you in an exclusive capacity." Now it was Seteth's turn to smile.

"Really? Are you certain?" He asked, reaching out to take one of Byleth's hands.

"Yes. I'm positive. Go ahead and set up the HR meeting." Seteth nodded and quickly looked around for any onlookers before pulling Byleth into his arms, kissing her sweetly. Once he pulled away, Byleth stayed close, quickly pulling out her phone to show Seteth the picture Claude had sent. 

"So, Claude and Dimitri got engaged." Seteth's eyebrows lifted as he examined the selfie.

"Well now, it seems like new beginnings are a common theme this morning." Byleth stepped back and away from Seteth's car so that he could get in. "Are you still coming over for pizza night?" 

"I wouldn't miss it."

\---

Not long after returning home and getting into her lounging clothes did Byleth receive a text message from Seteth confirming that he had scheduled their HR meeting for the following day at noon. She didn’t like the idea of going into work on her day off, but it was as Dimitri said. When she was dedicated to something, she did whatever she could to make it work. Perhaps once everything was settled, she and Seteth could go on that date in public that he had suggested. 

She spent the remainder of the morning and afternoon napping in-between loads of laundry and an ongoing binge of _Fact or Faked: Fodlan Paranormal Files_. Once her laundry was done and haphazardly thrown into her basket, Byleth retreated to her room to sleep properly, promising herself that she’d fold the laundry later. 

\---

Byleth found herself twitching nervously throughout the entire HR meeting. Seteth did most of the talking, much to her relief. He had clearly thought through _exactly_ what he was going to say, and Byleth only had to give her input when she was directly addressed. As she suspected, her relationship with Seteth was, in fact, a conflict of interest. Since the relationship was consensual and had not impacted their work, no disciplinary action was to be taken. That was a relief for Byleth especially, considering that she had very deliberately used her best friend to get Seteth to break. They simply didn’t mention that to HR. It wasn’t relevant. However, at the insistence of HR, she would have to transfer departments or hospitals so that Seteth was no longer her supervisor. One quick search later, and Byleth had a couple of options for transfers. There was an opening for a day shift in outpatient ortho with Dr. Manuela Casagranda, as well as an opening in Cath Lab with Dr. Catherine Charon. It was suggested that Byleth take the next couple of days off to read about the responsibilities of both positions and to choose one, the other, or neither if she felt so inclined. They would meet up again before Byleth’s next shift, and she would present her decision then.

With the pending approval of their relationship from HR (contingent on Byleth’s position change), Seteth and Byleth emerged from the office. Byleth slumped into a chair near the door. Seteth reached over and squeezed Byleth’s hand in an attempt to comfort her.

“You know, Byleth, if you don’t want to transfer out of the ER, I can ask HR if perhaps I could transfer instead.” Byleth looked up and shook her head.

“No. I want to show you that I’m dedicated to making this relationship work. You love your job, and it makes it easy to be with Flayn during the day. I couldn’t take that away from you. And it would be nice to have a consistent schedule. Dr. Seiros is great, but I can’t bounce between the day and night shift forever.”

“If you’re certain, then I won’t stop you. Now, how about I buy you lunch, and we can go over the job openings?” Byleth smiled brightly and nodded. Seteth held out an arm to her, and Byleth stood, taking it gratefully. Yes, she could get used to this.

\---

Byleth had always prided herself on the strong relationship that she had with her father. Perhaps it had something to do with the fact that he had raised her by himself, having lost his wife and Byleth’s mother to illness when Byleth had been just two years old. Even now, at almost 30 years old, the young PA kept her father updated on the newest developments in her life. She had dinner with him once every other week and was always there for him when he needed help around the house. Perhaps there were some benefits to living just 20 minutes away by car. The one thing that Byleth didn’t keep her father updated on was her love life. He had always been overly protective of her when it came to men, whether it had been her high school “boyfriends” or her casual setup with Claude. The only reason her father had accepted Claude at all was because he was with Dimitri. Jeralt Eisner was a retired Fodlan Police Officer, after all. He knew how to scare away just about any young man who came calling.

Things were different with Seteth. He was older than her by ten years, and a father to a daughter himself. He was 22 years Jeralt’s junior, but still a lot older than the other men that Byleth had been involved with. Her philosophy when it came to age differences was that the older one got, the less the age gap mattered. Jeralt himself had been twelve years older than her mother, and Byleth planned to use that nugget of information if Jeralt even _dared_ to mention the age difference between her and Seteth. 

Of course, she hadn’t exactly told her father that she was seeing someone. She and Seteth had been dating for five months now, and she simply hadn’t felt the need to announce that she was in a committed, happy relationship. The people that needed to know already knew: Flayn, Dimitri, and Claude. She hadn’t even changed her relationship status on FodlanBook. To her credit, neither had Seteth. The only evidence that she had of being in a relationship was the picture on her lockscreen. A rather adorable selfie of her kissing Seteth in the movie theater. Seteth had the same picture as her contact profile image on his phone. She had seen it when she called his cellphone after he thought he lost it. It had been under the bed.

She was helping her dad clean out his garage one uneventful Saturday on her day off. She had set her phone on the workbench while she moved boxes when it let out the cheerful notification chirp. Usually, Byleth wouldn’t mind if her dad saw her notifications. It was usually just from Claude or Dimitri. Jeralt approached the workbench and picked up her device as Byleth set down the box she was carrying. He stared at the screen for a moment, then walked it over to Byleth. The young woman looked down at the screen and saw that it was just a FodlanBook notification.

“So, kid. Who is that you’re kissing in your photo?” Byleth’s eyes went wide as she remembered that she hadn’t told her dad that she was seeing someone.

“Oh. That’s Seteth.” She answered casually, not elaborating much further. If her dad wanted to know more, he’d ask. She was praying he wouldn’t. He did.

“And who is Seteth?” Jeralt leaned against his workbench and crossed his arms over his chest. Byleth sighed and pocketed her phone.

“He’s my boyfriend. We’ve been seeing each other for a few months.” Jeralt barked out a laugh.

“And when were you planning to tell me about this?” 

Byleth shrugged. “I don’t know, Dad. I didn’t know if it would even last this long. I was going to tell you eventually.”

Jeralt laughed again. “So you tell me that Claude is engaged on the day it happens, but you wait several months to tell me that _you_ are seeing someone? Gee, thanks, kid.”

“Dad, don’t be that way. You have to admit that you haven’t reacted well to my past relationships. Remember the first time you met Claude? You had Alois run a background check on him!” 

“You’re damn right, I did. Claude is a good kid, but can you blame me for worrying?”

“That’s exactly why I didn’t tell you about Seteth. I’m 29 years old, Dad, I don’t need you to scare off potential romantic partners for me. I can do that myself.”

“Well, if you don’t want me to run a check, you can always tell me about him. How’d you meet him? What does he do? How old is he?” Byleth sighed. She knew this had been coming.

“He’s a doctor at Fodlan General. We met at work. He’s 38.” Jeralt’s eyebrows lifted. “Don’t look at me like that, Dad. He’s a good man, and everything is above board with HR.”

“I feel like there’s a big piece of information that you’re not sharing, kid. Spill. What’s his deal? Is he a former criminal? Does he have a gambling addiction? Is he in AA?”

“What? No! None of that!” Byleth frowned deeply. “He’s a single father to an adorable little girl named Flayn. She’s twelve, and she’s a very sweet, well behaved young lady.”

“And what about the kid’s mom?”

“She died ten years ago. Car accident.” 

Jeralt hummed, thinking over the information. “I want to meet him.” 

Byleth’s mouth dropped open. “You _do_?” 

Jeralt laughed heartily. “Yeah, kid. I can tell you’ve got it bad for this one. Might as well meet the guy and see what has you so smitten.”

“Dad, oh my goddess.”

“See when he’s free to get dinner. We’ll sit down, have a meal, and have a chat.” Byleth pulled out her phone to text Seteth. Jeralt stood up and made his way towards the door into the house. “Come inside when you’re done. I want to hear more.”

Byleth tucked her phone away in her pocket and retreated into the house. She could hear the TV coming from the living room, so she went straight there to find her dad sitting on the couch with a beer in one hand and _Fodlan’s Most Wanted_ playing on the TV. Byleth cleared her throat. Jeralt looked up, then grabbed the remote to mute the television. 

“Did you talk to your big doctor boyfriend?” he asked teasingly. Byleth crossed her arms over her chest and rolled her eyes.

“His name is Seteth, dad. And he wants to meet you too. We’re both off on Friday, so just pick a place and time, and we’ll be there.” Jeralt hummed thoughtfully before taking a sip of his beer.

“Kirsten’s, around dinner time. Might want to make a reservation, though. It’ll be busy on a Friday night.” Relief washed over Byleth. A good, busy, public place where Jeralt couldn’t hurt Seteth even if he wanted to. Her dad loved that pub too much to get kicked out for fighting. He turned the volume on the TV back on. Clearly their conversation was over. Byleth stepped out of the room to call the restaurant to make their reservation. Usually they didn’t take them so far in advance, but Jeralt was a regular, and Kirsten’s was always happy to serve him and his cop buddies. Once everything was confirmed, Byleth texted Seteth again.

\---

The remainder of the week was spent preparing Seteth for any of the potential questions that could come from her dad at their upcoming dinner. Even Flayn got in on the preparations by helping her father pick out an outfit that was casual, but not overly so. When Seteth arrived at Byleth’s townhouse to pick her up, she was very impressed to find him dressed in a black button-down shirt, grey slacks, black loafers, and a spiffy dark brown leather jacket. Byleth herself had dressed up for the occasion in a black knee-length dress with sheer patterned sleeves that narrowed at the wrists. She stepped out of the townhouse and locked the door behind her.

“You look beautiful tonight,” Seteth complimented, holding out his arm for Byleth to take, even though they were just walking to his car. Byleth smiled.

“You look very spiffy yourself, Set. Perfect for meeting my dad.” Seteth opened the passenger door for Byleth and she slid in, setting her purse in her lap and waiting for Seteth to get in his seat. Seteth closed the door and rounded the front of the car. As soon as he was seated and the vehicle was running, he turned to Byleth.

“You think so? Flayn helped me pick it out. It’s not too out of character for me?” Byleth shook her head, no.

“Not at all. Don’t worry, my dad will see very quickly just how great you are.”

“I aim to please.”

\---

Seteth and Byleth arrived at the small local pub first and quickly found a parking spot. The rush hadn’t quite picked up yet, and with their reservation they were seated immediately in a booth near the back of the restaurant. Byleth settled in the corner, and Seteth took a seat next to her. She leaned her head on his shoulder. Not five minutes passed before she watched her father enter the restaurant at 6:30 on the nose. She could feel the intimidation radiating off of him, and he hadn’t even approached yet. Byleth lifted her head and pointed at her father.

“That’s my dad,” she told Seteth. When her boyfriend’s gaze drifted to Jeralt, his eyes widened a bit. Clearing his throat as he approached the booth, Seteth stood to greet him. Jeralt stopped about four feet away from Seteth and stared him up and down. Not deterred by this, Seteth held out his hand to shake Jeralt’s. 

“Mr. Eisner. It’s a pleasure to meet you. I am Dr. Seteth Assal, Byleth’s boyfriend.” Jeralt’s hand met Seteth’s in a firm shake. Byleth took the opportunity to stand from the booth as well so that she could greet her father as well.

“So you’re the infamous boyfriend. Well, I must admit, I didn’t expect such a strong handshake.” He let go of Seteth’s hand and turned to Byleth. “Hey, Kid. Aren’t you going to give your old man a hug?” Byleth obliged and embraced her dad for a moment before slipping back into the booth, Seteth following her lead. Jeralt took a seat across from them and picked up the menu.

“Tell me, _doctor_ , have you ever been here before?” Jeralt asked, clearly not wasting any time. Seteth nodded. 

“Yes, I bring my daughter here sometimes. It has a nice party room that we’ve utilized for past birthdays.”

“Ah, yes, Byleth told me you have a kid.” Seteth opened his mouth to respond, but at that moment, the waiter walked over with glasses of water for the three of them. As soon as Jeralt had placed an order for a beer and an appetizer sampler, he looked back to Seteth.

“Dad, you shouldn’t be drinking beer. Your heart medicine…” Byleth scolded quietly. Seteth’s gaze moved between the two Eisners. He didn’t want to impose on what seemed like a private matter, but he _was_ a doctor. It was only natural that health conversations were of interest to him. Jeralt rolled his eyes, which surprised Seteth.

“Kid, one beer is not going to kill me. I’ve survived worse than having high blood pressure, and I don’t plan on dying anytime soon.” Byleth’s frown deepened.

“Yes, _one_ beer won’t kill you, but I saw the beer in your fridge... Dad, I’ve seen the signs of pending doom in hundreds of patients. I don’t want that to be you.”

“Alright, Kid. I get the picture. I’ll toss the beer that I have in the fridge when I get home, but I still want the one I ordered.” Byleth sighed and hid behind her menu. Her dad was stubborn to a fault, and she didn’t know if she’d ever get through to him. She had been trying for nearly a decade to get him to give a damn about his health to no avail. “Besides, we’re not here to argue about my health. We’re here to learn more about your Doctor Friend. I believe he was just about to tell me about his own kid.” Seteth had worry in his eyes, but he did not press on the matter of Jeralt’s health. Instead, he took a sip of his water and began to talk about Flayn.

\---

Dinner was well underway, and much to Byleth’s surprise, Jeralt and Seteth were getting along reasonably well. They hadn’t yelled at each other, or disagreed on anything major, they agreed on various parenting tactics and had even exchanged daughter stories (much to Byleth’s embarrassment and shock). All in all, the evening was going much more smoothly than probably any of them had expected.

“So, how long did the two of you work together before you decided to get involved?” Jeralt asked as he took a bite of the massive burger before him. 

“We worked together off and on for about a year. Byleth was working under Doctor Seiros and was assigned to me when she went on maternity leave. I must admit, our early relationship was rocky…”

“We hated each other’s guts,” Byleth stated bluntly. “He was a dick.”

“And she was insubordinate and snippy,” Seteth added.

Jeralt raised an eyebrow at his daughter. “But his tune changed when Flayn broke her leg and I caught a rare fracture in her knee. Seeing him care so much for his daughter...well, I admit that I warmed up to him after that.”

“And I realized that she was _not_ in fact like all of the other newly graduated med students who come through my ER. She is professional and serious and has excellent bedside manner.” Byleth smiled and leaned over to press a kiss to Seteth’s cheek. “And my daughter loves her, so how could I not as well?”

“I suppose I can’t argue with that logic,” Jeralt conceded as he finished off his burger. “I spent the majority of By’s teenage years scaring off boys that were no good for her. I tried to scare off that Von Riegan boy, but he seems to have stuck around whether I like it or not. However, you...you’re different. You’ve got your shit together, which I admire, and judging by those looks you’ve been giving her all night, I’d say that you’re as smitten for her as she is for you.”

“Dad!” Byleth yelped. Jeralt laughed.

“The point is, I trust my kid’s judgment--to some extent--and know that if you ever hurt her, I will hunt you down. Like any good father would. I know you’ll do the same for your little girl someday when she’s old enough to have a beau of her own.”

“Someday far, _far_ in the future,” Seteth agreed.

“You say that now, but I once told Byleth that she couldn’t date until she’s 30. And that’s just six short months away. The point is, I can tell that By is happy with you. I couldn’t take that away from her if I tried, so I might as well steer into the skid on this one.” Byleth’s smile grew.

“Sir, I promise you that I will care for your daughter until my dying days. If she’ll have me, that is.” Byleth took Seteth’s hand and squeezed her answer.

“Good. That’s the kind of thing a dad likes to hear from his daughter’s boyfriend.”

\---

After paying the bill and bidding farewell to Jeralt with a thanks for the lovely evening, Seteth and Byleth made their way back to her townhouse to unwind. They settled on the couch, Seteth wrapping an around Byleth’s shoulders and pulling her close.

“I really think my dad liked you,” Byleth said with a gentle smile. “He acknowledged you as my boyfriend, which is more than I can say him ever doing for anyone else I’ve been involved with over the years.”

“Well, your father is a good man who clearly cares about you. I was happy to meet him and reassure him that you are in good hands.” Byleth leaned up to press a kiss to Seteth’s lips.

“Oh, I’m in good hands, alright. In fact, why don’t you put those good hands to better use? I think we should celebrate the fact that my dad accepted you.” She didn’t need to say much more after that as she took her boyfriend’s hand and led him towards the bedroom.

\---

Seteth left the following morning to go pick up Flayn from her uncle’s house, leaving Byleth to her own devices. She had the day off again today, but he would have to go into work later that evening which meant tending to her little garden and doing a couple of loads of laundry (she needed clean scrubs something fierce).

As she set the last load into the washing machine, her phone buzzed incessantly in her pocket, notifying her of an incoming phone call. Byleth pulled it out and saw that it was her dad calling. He called at least once a week, but never this late. Perhaps it was to talk about the previous night. She accepted the call and held the phone to her ear.

“Hey Dad, what’s up?” 

_“Hey, kid. I need some...urgh...medical advice._ ” He sounded as though he were in pain, which sent a rush of worry though Byleth’s body.

“Sure dad, what’s the matter?” She took a seat on the couch.

_“I haven’t felt like myself today. My chest feels tight, like...hngh...something heavy is pressed against it. I’m short of breath, and I can’t make it upstairs.”_

“Hmm, it could be any number of things, Dad...what other symptoms have you experienced?”

_“Well, even now...my jaw is, uh, kind of sore.”_ Byleth’s eyes widened at the mention. She had to confirm the fear that was growing in her belly.

“Dad, does your left arm hurt?”

_“How did you know? Yes, it does. I think I might have pulled something when I was lifting weights yesterday.”_

“Dad, I need you to sit down and listen to me very carefully. You are more than likely having a heart attack. I am going to call you an ambulance, and I will be there as soon as I possibly can.”

Before Jeralt could respond, Byleth had hung up the call and was dialing 911 as she grabbed her keys and rushed out of the townhouse, nearly forgetting to lock the door.

_“Fodlan 911, what is your emergency?”_

“Yeah, hi. I need an ambulance sent to 7213 Maurice Ave in Fodlan Heights. My dad just contacted me, and I have reason to believe that he is having a heart attack. I’m a Physician’s Assistant at Fodlan General, but I’m 20 minutes away, at least.”

_“And your father’s name?”_

“Jeralt Eisner.”

_“I have sent out the call, and an ambulance will be at that address in 15 minutes._ ” Byleth sighed. Fifteen minutes was too long, but it was shorter than her drive, so she thanked the dispatcher and hung up. She hopped in her car and peeled out of the driveway as fast as she could without hitting Dimitri’s car that was parked in the street. 

\---

Byleth arrived at her father’s house 18 minutes later. She was relieved to see that the ambulance had arrived and that the front door to her father’s house was open. She parked the car and ran up the driveway into the house where the paramedics were strapping her father to the stretcher. He was still conscious but seemed as though he was in severe pain.

“Dad, are you okay?” she asked, making her way over to the stretcher. Jeralt stared at her with heavily lidded eyes.

“It hurts kid, but-” He paused to flinch. “-I’ve survived worse than this. Don’t you worry about me.” Jeralt raised his hand weakly and nudged her chin affectionately. The paramedics turned to Byleth.

“You his kid?” one of them asked.

“Yeah. I’m a PA at Fodlan General. I placed the 911 call. I can ride with you guys, right?”

“Yes, in the front.” The other paramedic said. “1, 2, 3, lift!” the lifted the stretcher and locked it in position before wheeling it out of the house and down the driveway towards the cab. Byleth followed after them and made her way to the passenger seat of the ambulance, quickly pulling her badge from her purse to show the driver. She could hear the paramedics in the backseat, making sure that Jeralt was settled before announcing to the driver to get going. 

The ambulance raced down the road towards the hospital. It would be at least 20 minutes before they arrived. Byleth listened carefully to what was going on in the back. Her heart pounded in her chest and blood roared in her ears. She wished more than anything that she could be back there with her father. Five minutes had passed when suddenly, one of the paramedics called to the driver.

“We need to speed it up! Sirens on! He’s going into cardiac arrest!” Byleth could swear that her heart had stopped beating as well. She moved to look back, but the driver held out an arm to prevent her from doing so. The ambulance picked up speed and the siren was piercingly loud. _No, no, no. Please. Not now. We’re almost there._

\---

Claude had just finished clearing out Trauma Bay 2 of its latest patient. Luckily, they were now stable and had been moved to a regular room for recovery. As he made his way back downstairs, he heard his walkie talkie go off. 

_“Cardiac arrest patient ETA 10 minutes, CPR started. Need trauma bay and trauma team for resuscitation efforts. Patient Name is Eisner, Jeralt. Daughter on board.”_

Claude’s eyes went wide as he listened to the quick responses to the announcement, confirming that Trauma Bay 1 would be available for their use upon arrival. Before he knew what he was doing, he was jumping down the stairs two at a time, running as fast as his legs could carry him towards the ER. His badge beeped as he entered, nearly knocking over a nurse in his path. He looked around the room, and spotting the green-haired doctor near the curtain separating Bed 3 and the central area, he approached. 

“Dr. Assal, I need to speak with you immediately,” he said breathlessly. “It’s urgent.” Seteth turned, certainly not having expected to see Claude there. He gestured towards his pod and Claude followed. Once they were in his small office with the door closed, Claude spoke.

“Just heard on the walkie. Incoming ambulance with a cardiac arrest patient. It’s...It’s Byleth and her dad.” Seteth’s eyes widened as he stood, worry in his features. “I really think you should meet them when they get here. No doubt, By is going to try to get in there, and you and I both know they’re not going to let her.”

“Thank you for letting me know, Mr. Von Riegan. I will head over there now.” Claude nodded and exited the pod, followed by Seteth shortly after.

\---

Everything was moving in a blur for Byleth from the moment her father went into cardiac arrest. She couldn’t see straight, and her whole body shook with nerves. They had to save him; he couldn’t leave her yet. The ambulance pulled up to the Trauma doors. What Byleth hadn’t expected to see was Seteth waiting by the doors. The stretcher and paramedics went in first and were quickly joined by the trauma team as they continued the efforts to bring an unresponsive Jeralt back from the brink. Byleth started to move after them but was stopped by Seteth and the ambulance driver.

“Let me go! I have to be in there with him!” She demanded, pulling against her boyfriend’s grip.

“Byleth, you know you’re not allowed to go in there. The trauma team has things under control,” Seteth said reassuringly. “Come on, we’ll go sit in the waiting area, I will get you some coffee, and we’ll wait patiently for them to stabilize your father.” Byleth weakly pulled once more, but seeing that Seteth was not going to relent, she eventually obliged and allowed him to lead her to the waiting area. 

The following fifteen minutes felt like an eternity as Byleth waited to hear the news of her dad’s condition. Seteth waited beside her, exhibiting the patience of a saint as she rambled her worries and fears to him. She couldn’t lose her dad now. He _had_ to be okay. He had survived much worse than this...how could he just…? This was _precisely_ what she had been talking about the previous night at dinner. Her coffee went untouched beside her. She was too nervous and scared to drink it right now.

Byleth Eisner, the unshakable PA who spent day in and day out caring for patients in the exact same position that her father was now in, was rocking back and forth in her seat trying not to cry. She supposed that it was different when it was happening to immediate family. The only family she had left. She knew the trauma team would do everything in their power to save him. She just had to have a little faith. _He's going to be okay. He's going to be okay. He's going to be--_

The doors leading to the trauma bay opened, and one of the trauma doctors emerged. Byleth stood quickly as he approached. The look on his face was stoic and stern. That couldn't be a good sign.

"Byleth?" He addressed quietly. She nodded and followed the doctor down the hall a little ways so they could speak. Seteth stayed in his seat, for the time being, watching them.

"Byleth, I'm so sorry...we did everything we possibly could…" the doctor spoke gently. The PA's eyes widened, tears threatening to fall. _No. No. No. No. No. No._ "Your father has passed away." 

Byleth collapsed to the floor, letting out a blood-curdling cry of agony. 

_No._


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Byleth deals with the aftermath of her father's death. Her coping is less than healthy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi guys! I just wanted to warn you ahead of time about the content of this chapter. It deals a lot with mental health, grief, healthy and unhealthy coping mechanisms, and the ideas that you are not alone in the darkest times. Byleth herself may seem a little out of character, however, I believe that this is how she behaved in-game when Jeralt passed away. Please see the end of the fic for some important notes and thank you so much for reading!!!

For the last two weeks, she had been on autopilot. Every cell in her body had gone numb and she no longer felt anything. She vaguely registered the occasional tear that would roll down her cheek but she didn’t acknowledge it, almost as though she had cried all of the tears that were in her eyes. Just when she thought that she was finally done crying, it would come back full force, sobs wracking her body and making her chest hurt. 

Byleth didn’t let anyone see her in such a state, of course. To show weakness would make people worry, and she didn’t want people to worry about her. Especially not Claude, Dimitri, or Seteth, despite them being the closest people to her. Her phone was overflowing with notifications of condolences--she shut them all off and didn’t reply. The only person she remained in communication with was Alois, her father’s former partner on the force, as they planned his funeral. It would be a small affair, non-formal with honors. Alois encouraged her to invite anyone who might provide some comfort during such a difficult service. She didn’t want to see  _ anyone _ , she just wanted her father back. No amount of prayers to the Goddess or singing hymns would do that, so what did it matter?

It was raining on the day of the funeral. Nature’s way of rubbing salt in an already festering wound. There would be a service, followed by a small reception at Kirsten’s. Byleth had protested against the idea. She didn’t want to drag things out more than necessary, however, she wouldn’t stop Alois if he wanted to hold a reception. It was a small turnout, just the members of her father’s former precinct as well as Seteth, Dimitri and Claude. Byleth stayed in the corner of the front hall, watching Alois greet people. How was he so cheery even now? She’d heard it said that instead of mourning the dead, one should celebrate their life. There wasn’t anything to celebrate in her eyes. The goddess had taken her father away from her too soon.

Claude and Dimitri entered the church. Their faces bore somber expressions. Claude’s turned to worry upon seeing Byleth by herself in the corner. He whispered something to Dimitri who nodded and moved to greet Alois before going into the sanctuary to sit and wait for the service to begin. Claude shoved his hands in his pockets and leaned up against the wall next to his best friend.

“How are you holding up?” he asked. Byleth stared blankly at him before turning her attention back to the art of the four saints on the opposite wall.

“I’ve been better.” Claude’s gaze moved in the same direction as Byleth’s gaze, staring down the painting.

“I saw Dr. Assal in the parking lot. We talked for a few minutes. He’s worried about you. Dima and I are worried about you.”

“Don’t be. I’m fine.”

“No offense, By, but you are  _ not _ fine. Is it true that Dr. Casagranda sent you home early a couple of days ago?”

“I don’t want to talk about this,” Byleth said, straightening up and moving to walk away. Claude caught her wrist before she could get too far. “Claude, let go of me  _ right now _ .” Her best friend released her wrist and she stared at him disappointedly. “The service is going to start soon. You should go find Dimitri…” Byleth turned and walked into the sanctuary, not taking note that Seteth had just walked into the church and had witnessed the whole scene. Claude looked over at the doctor and frowned.

“Saw that, did ya?” Seteth was watching through the open sanctuary doors as Byleth took a seat at the very front of the church, completely ignoring everyone else in the room. He approached Claude and stood next to him. “I’ve known Byleth for just shy of a decade and I’ve  _ never _ seen her like this. I’m really worried.”

“I think, Mr. Von Riegan, that she simply needs time to process things. I remember being in a very similar state after losing my wife. Of course, I could not remain in that state for very long, as I had a two-year-old to care for. Byleth just lost the last of her family. She will probably be like this for a while.” Claude returned his hands to his pockets and pushed them as deep as they would go.

“I just want to help. She’s my best friend, ya know? It hurts to see her like this.”

“She’s lucky to have a best friend like you, Mr. Von Riegan. Your opportunity to assist will come in due time.” Claude nodded in agreement.

“And I’ll be here when the time comes.” Seteth clapped Claude on the shoulder blade fondly and made his way into the sanctuary. He took a seat in the same pew as Byleth, only a couple feet from her. Under normal circumstances, he would have sat closer and even put an arm around Byleth, however, he could tell that such actions would not be appropriate at the moment. It was silent between them for several minutes as the other funeral attendees took their seats and chattered quietly amongst themselves while waiting for the service to start.

“My dad wasn’t very religious…” Byleth said quietly to no one in particular. “He would  _ hate _ that his funeral was taking place in a church.” Seteth turned to look at Byleth, waiting to hear if she would continue her thought. “He once told me that he stopped going to church after my mom died. Didn’t want to force me into believing a religion if I didn’t want to. That he only attended church because it made my mom happy. I wonder if they’re together and happy now.”

“I’m certain they are,” Seteth mused, looking up at the large idol of the Goddess Sothis behind the dais at the front of the church. Byleth sniffled quietly, wiping away a stray tear.

“I know I’m not alone in the world, but it sure feels like it when you don’t have a family anymore.” Byleth frowned deeply.

“I hope this isn’t too presumptuous of me...but you can consider myself and Flayn to be family if you feel so inclined.” Before Byleth could respond, the priest had cleared his throat into the microphone and was instructing those who hadn’t done so to take their seats so that they could begin. His timing was impeccable, Byleth honestly hadn’t come up with an answer for Seteth yet.

\---

The time for eulogies came after an extended moment of silence for Jeralt. If Byleth was being honest with herself, this was the most bearable part of the service. No chatter, no inane singing, no talking about her father. Just time to reflect and listen. A chance to  _ pray _ . She had explained to Seteth that she and her father had never been religious, but prayer was something that always made her feel better for a reason that she had yet to glean from her unconscious.

Alois went first, sharing a “humorous” story about his drunken escapades with Jeralt in their youths during their time at the police academy, and how they ended when he laid eyes upon his future wife, Byleth’s mother. How he looked Alois in the eye, hazy after four beers, and told him that he would marry that woman someday. He concluded with a look back at the official police headshot, gave a salute to his former superior officer, and sat down. 

The next person to stand up was another one of Jeralt’s former subordinates, Shamir. A serious-looking woman, whom Byleth had seen around when she was a young child. She kept her eulogy short and sweet, expressing her respect for Jeralt and how he had personally trained her upon her arrival from Dagda. She had been there the day his career ended, and she felt somewhat responsible that he had been injured while protecting her. She did not shed a single tear during her eulogy, unlike Alois, who was blubbering in the first row unabashedly.

The final person to go before Byleth was someone she had only seen in passing. According to the program that she was currently crinkling in her hands nervously, his name was Dedue. He shared a story about Jeralt’s bravery in taking on single parenthood with Byleth, and how he had raised her well, despite Dedue not knowing her very well. Jeralt had apparently shared numerous stories in Byleth’s youth, always expressing pride and happiness when he talked about her. Byleth looked down at her lap as Dedue sat down, unable to make eye contact.

She was next.

Byleth stood slowly and approached the platform. All eyes in the room were on her. She had written down the gist of what she wanted to say about her dad, and the paper felt heavy in her hands. Taking a deep breath, Byleth leaned into the microphone. 

“My dad…” she began slowly, looking down at the paper before her. “M-my...my dad…” Byleth turned to look at the photo behind her for a moment, then looked back at her notes. Had they always been so blurry? No, she was on the verge of tears. Her eyes felt heavy and she tried to blink them away to no avail. She felt nauseous. Before Byleth fully comprehended her actions, she ran down the steps, down the middle aisle, and out the doors. 

\---

Byleth was so grateful for the unisex bathrooms that the church had instead of large public restrooms. She locked the door and sunk down against it, letting the tears flow. She had been crying a lot as of late, unable to control the waves of emotion that hit her like a raging tsunami. Her tears were very much involuntary. She wanted nothing more than to be strong for her dad. He would be appalled if he saw her like this over him. She didn’t keep track of how long she had been in the restroom, but it couldn’t have been long, because there was fierce pounding on the door.

“Byleth?” came Seteth’s voice from the other side of the door. “Byleth are you in there?” Her boyfriend had come to convince her to go back inside the sanctuary, she just knew it. She pulled her knees close to her chest and continued to sob. She didn’t give Seteth an answer. “I can hear you crying, By,” his calm voice came through after several moments. She remained silent as she had nothing to say. “Byleth, would you like me to take you home?”

That was certainly not the question she had expected to come from him. However, the offer was there.  _ Yes, take me home _ . Her brain supplied, but the words did not leave her mouth. Instead, Byleth stood, approached the sink, splashed some water on her face in an attempt to appear composed (it wasn’t working). She used her dress sleeve to dry her face, as there were no paper towels in the room, just a hand dryer. Finally, she unlocked the door and exited the restroom. Seteth stood a couple of feet away from the door and his facial expression  _ screamed _ worry. Byleth wouldn’t let that get to her. Instead, she approached him and wrapped her arms around his waist. Seteth didn’t hesitate to embrace her back, holding her close. 

“Take me home please,” came her muffled request. She could take the bus to retrieve her car tomorrow or the next day. Perhaps she could ask Claude to bring it to her if he had the time. It would be safe here. Seteth nodded above her and moved to wrap an arm around her shoulders so he could lead her out to his SUV. 

She knew that since Alois had been in charge of planning the funeral, that there would be a casket lowering later on. She hadn’t planned to attend from the start. Alois had respected her decision and promised that he’d email her with the cemetery information after he was buried, just in case she ever wanted to visit him. She had thanked him for that when they were planning, but she didn’t know how soon it would be before she could work up the courage to visit him.

The church was not far from her townhouse, only ten minutes by car. Byleth stayed silent the entire way, staring blankly out the window. Seteth did not try to make conversation, which Byleth appreciated. She wouldn’t be able to say much without crying anyway. Perhaps Seteth understood that. They pulled into her driveway and Byleth grabbed her purse from the car floor, took a deep breath, and turned to Seteth before getting out. 

“Thank you, Seteth,” she said quietly. Her boyfriend nodded and gave her a reassuring smile. It didn’t help lift her spirits.

“You’re very welcome. Would you like me to take you to pick up your car tomorrow?” Byleth shook her head, no.

“That’s alright. I can ask Claude to do it or take the bus. The offer is appreciated, though.”

“Very well, let me know if you change your mind. Are you going to be alright?” Byleth shrugged.

“No, if I’m being entirely honest. I think I just need an evening to myself. Maybe I’ll take a bath and go to bed early.”

“That sounds lovely. Please get some well-deserved rest.” Seteth leaned over the armrest and pressed a kiss to Byleth’s cheek. “I will call you tomorrow?” Byleth shrugged. She had wanted to turn her phone off due to the unusually high influx of condolences, but logically, it wouldn’t make sense to do so. She needed to be reachable if necessary. She could just delete the messages.

“If you want to...can't promise that I’ll answer, though. Uh, thanks again.” Byleth got out of the car and didn’t look back to see that Seteth was watching her to make sure she got inside safely.

\---

That evening, after her bath, Byleth sat on the couch in her pajamas. The TV was on, but she wasn’t paying attention to it. She pulled out her phone and sent off a quick text to Claude. 

Byleth wished that she could agree with Claude. That her being here still counted for something. She felt empty and broken. Byleth had never been an emotional person, she didn’t get attached easily. Besides Claude and her Dad (and now Seteth), she didn’t see herself getting attached to anyone else. Attachment was overrated. It only led to pain in the end.  _ Love  _ was overrated. She loved her dad and look where that got her. 

That’s when she realized that she hadn’t eaten all day. Byleth got up from the couch and moved to the freezer, removing a pint of peanut butter cup ice cream. Sugar would help, even if it wasn’t substantial. Perhaps she could order some Chinese food as well…

\---

Byleth didn’t sleep a wink that night, even though she told Seteth that she would go to bed early. Instead, she consumed an ungodly amount of Chinese food and ice cream and watched Turner Classic Movies until her eyes could not stay open any longer. She woke twenty minutes later to the sound of knocking on her door. One look at the clock showed that it was about 9:45 in the morning. Damn.

“By? It’s Claude. I brought your car back, and a few other things.” Byleth looked to the door. She didn’t want to answer it, because that meant letting Claude see her in her sleep deprived state. She could feel the bags under her eyes, and she reeked of soy sauce. Gross. “Byleth, I know you’re in there...I can hear the TV.” Claude was silent for a few moments, waiting for her to come open the door. “I just want to help, By. Please...2AM chinese food can only do so much...” She imagined him running a hand through his hair outside. Byleth clutched a pillow off the couch and held it close to her chest. 

“By, I know you’re hurting right now...but I just want you to know how much we love you. When you’re ready to talk, you know where to find us. I uh...I left your car key in the planter.” That was the last thing he said before she heard his retreating footsteps on the concrete. Even after Claude left, Byleth did not go to the door. Instead, she got up and went to change her pajamas. The smell of soy sauce was overwhelming.

\---

Byleth had taken a long weekend off for the funeral, which Manuela had approved without question. Sunday rolled around, and Byleth finally changed the channel from TCM to Game Show Network. She was getting bored with the black and white anyway. She hadn’t taken a proper shower since Friday night, and her hair was starting to feel greasy. She had ordered a pizza on Saturday night, eaten half of it, and spent the rest of the evening trying not to fall asleep. Byleth had one more day off before she had to return to work, and she was grateful for a distraction that would give her money instead of spending it.

At 6:30PM, the doorbell rang. Byleth hadn’t ordered any food because she had leftover pizza. Hopefully it wasn’t Claude again. Her physical and mental state were not in any place for guests right now. She stayed on the couch, ignoring her visitor. The doorbell rang a couple more times.

“Byleth, it is Seteth. Will you please let me in?” Seteth’s voice sounded from the other side of the door. Byleth panicked, she was in no state to see her boyfriend right now. She was embarrassed, ashamed, and scared. He had never seen her in such a state. “Byleth, I need to speak with you, please, let me in.”

“No.” Byleth called out. “You don’t want to see me like this.”

“Byleth, please. I don’t care how you look. I’m worried about you, you haven’t been answering my calls.” Byleth looked down at her phone which was by her side. She had four missed calls from Seteth and three from Claude. “Byleth, I have a key, you know.”  _ Shit he’s right _ . She heard the lock disengage and the door swing open. In a moment of fear, Byleth covered herself with a blanket that was laying over the arm of the couch. It had nothing to do with modesty, but the fact that she was not smelling very pleasant. Seteth closed the door behind himself and stepped into the townhouse, taking note of Byleth’s current position on the couch.

“Were you aware that there was a package from Claude on the front step? He hid it near the planter. I brought it inside.” Byleth did not look up from the TV. 

“Thanks…” she said. Seteth set down a few grocery bags on the table behind the couch, then moved to look Byleth in the eye. His nose crinkled upon being within range of her odor. Her eyes were bloodshot and she looked not only as though she had been crying, but also that she hadn’t been sleeping. Concern laced Seteth’s features, and he took a seat next to her on the couch. Considering how close he was to her, he clearly no longer cared (or at least wasn’t saying anything) about her smell. Byleth’s attention remained on the TV, ignoring Seteth’s presence.

“Byleth, I’ve been doing some thinking.” Seteth began. This got Byleth’s attention. She turned off the TV and turned to her boyfriend.

“Oh Goddess, you’re breaking up with me, aren’t you?” She asked, panic lacing her tone. Seteth gave her an incredulous look.

“What? No!” Seteth said. “I wasn’t thinking about our relationship, I was thinking about  _ you _ .” Byleth let out a sigh of relief. “I think you should take a leave of absence from the hospital.”

“Wait, why? I’m fine. I can work. I  _ need _ to go to work.”

“Byleth, I heard from Manuela that the past two weeks have been extremely rough on you. You’re making mistakes, showing up to work tired, and you’re lashing out at your coworkers and patients in your exhausted state. I know I’m not your boss anymore, but I  _ am _ your boyfriend. As your lover and a doctor, I am concerned.”

“...you have every right to be, however I don’t need your pity.” Byleth stood and moved away from Seteth. He sighed, but stayed on the couch.

“It’s not pity, Byleth. Do you think that I do not know what you are going through? I  _ do _ . I know probably better than anyone! Or need I remind you that I lost my wife to circumstances out of my control, just as you did your father?” Byleth was silent, listening and contemplating. Seteth let out a breath. “I was in a very similar state, and if it weren’t for my brothers’ willingness to care for Flayn while I grieved, I probably wouldn’t be here with you now. I know you’re grieving, I know it hurts. But ignoring it and pushing it aside will do  _ nothing _ .”

“Don’t you get it?” Byleth asked, whirling around to face him. “Work is the only thing keeping me from having a complete and utter breakdown! I’ve been crying nonstop, I haven’t bathed, I haven’t slept...it’s already spiraling, and if I don’t go back to work, that is just an excuse for me to spiral further. I don’t  _ have  _ brothers to help me. I don’t  _ have _ a child to care for! It’s just me! I don’t have any family left.” The tears streamed down her cheeks and she wiped them away with the back of her arm, sniffling the running snot back into her nose. 

“While that is true regarding your family, you are not completely alone. You have me and Flayn, you have Claude and Dimitri. We only want to help you. We care about you greatly and want the best for you. That’s all.”

“Then you have to let me grieve.” Byleth said, looking away. “In my own way.”

“Very well. I will leave the paperwork for your leave of absence on the table. I have filled it out, all it needs is your signature. Please consider doing so. Oh, and Flayn and I made you some pasta with homemade red sauce.” Seteth moved towards the door. “Please feel free to contact me day or night. I promise I will respond promptly, as long as I am not elbows deep in a person.” Byleth nodded and watched as Seteth left, giving her one last longing look before closing the door behind him.

She stood silently for a few moments, before her stomach let out a painful sounding rumble of hunger. That’s right, she hadn’t eaten in a few hours. She moved to the bag that Seteth had left for her, removing the tupperware from it. Taped to the top was a card that had clearly been made by Flayn (if the handwriting was any indication). She detached the card and opened it, reading the contents.

_ Byleth, _

_ I asked Dad if I could make you a card, and he said that sounded like a good idea. Dad won’t tell me what happened, but he says that you’re really sad right now. I am sorry that you are sad, because I like you a lot and I love playing video games with you and reading with you. Please come over soon so that I can give you a big hug. _

_ Love,  _

_ Flayn _

Byleth could feel the tears welling behind her eyes again, and she held the card close to her chest. That’s when she noticed the package that Claude had supposedly left on her porch. She opened the bag and inside was a big box of assorted chocolates and a DVD copy of  _ Clue _ . One of her all time favorite feel good movies. There was a small note in the bag as well. 

_ Hey By, _

_ Please enjoy eating this entire box of chocolates in one sitting while you watch one of your favorite movies. I know it’s hard right now, but know that me and Dima are here for you always. We love you so much, girl. You’re my best friend in the world and seeing you sad makes me sad. <3 _

_ Claude (and Dimitri) _

Byleth was full on crying now. Seteth had been serious when he said that she wasn’t alone, however, she hadn’t felt more alone than right at that moment.  _ She hadn’t told her dad that she loved him before he passed away. _ Byleth continued to sob, the new realization shaking her body and making her cough. Once she felt that there were no more tears to cry, she stood from the floor and took deep breaths. Her head was pounding from crying so much. 

First things first, she grabbed a pen from the cup of writing instruments on the table, and scrawled her name on the leave form. Then, padding into the kitchen she popped the tupperware in the microwave, Byleth watched it cook, then took the meal into the living room so that she could watch her movie. About 80% of the way through the movie and halfway through the box of chocolates, right before the endings, Byleth finally succumbed to the sleep she had been denying herself for more than two weeks. It was not restful in the slightest, but she simply couldn’t stay awake any longer. With the restless sleep came nightmares. Perhaps that was the true reason that she had been avoiding sleep.

\---

_ It was that night all over again. Byleth watched as the paramedics loaded her father into the ambulance. He was still conscious, and she attempted to get to him right as they lifted the stretcher in. “Dad, Dad! I--” The sirens were on, and she couldn’t be heard over them. _ __   
_   
_ __ She climbed into the ambulance and seated herself in the passenger seat. As they pulled up to a red light, she undid her seatbelt to climb to the back, only to be stopped by the driver and forced back into her seat. 

_ In an instant, she was in the trauma bay at the hospital, watching helplessly as the trauma team attempted to revive her father. He laid on the stretcher, completely unresponsive, though all she could see were his legs, as he was completely surrounded. Tears stung her eyes and she moved forward, trying desperately to reach him. She had to tell him. She  _ **_had to_ ** _. As she approached the stretcher, one of the nurses pushed her back. Every time she approached, she was blocked off. Ten times, then fifteen. She felt like Sisyphus, so close and yet so far. She screamed at him but no noise came from her mouth.  _

_ The sound of the flatline screamed in her ears as she sobbed.  _

\---

Byleth startled awake, nearly falling off the couch. “Dad!” she cried out into the darkness of her living room. The only illumination came from the TV which had returned to the DVD menu and was currently playing the roll of previews. She grappled for her phone and turned it on. Only 50% battery and it was 2:55 in the morning. Had she really slept that long? The PA swallowed thickly as she reoriented herself to her surroundings. She knew what she had to do.

Collecting her robe, slippers, phone, and keys, Byleth exited the townhouse and locked the door behind her. She started walking in the cool night air, trying to regain her composure before she arrived at her destination. Her fist reached out and rapped on the door, quietly at first, but progressively getting louder.

\---

Seteth was roused from his slumber by what sounded like a knocking at the door. His eyes drifted to the digital alarm clock on his nightstand. 3:05AM. Who on earth was knocking this early? Seteth stood and put on his slippers, going to the door. He was lucky that Flayn was a heavy sleeper. Opening the door, he was shocked to find Byleth standing there.

“Byleth-what?” he asked. Byleth took in a deep breath and let it out. Then, she spoke.

“Hey, um. I love you. And I just thought you should know that. Because I didn’t say it enough to my dad, and I didn’t get to say it to him before he died...I’ve realized that I really don’t say it enough to  _ anyone _ . Life is short, and we never know how it’s going to end. So I need you to know that I love you.” Seteth, in his tired state, took a moment to process what she was saying.

“Won’t you come in, Byleth? I don’t want to wake Flayn.” Byleth nodded and followed her boyfriend into the house. “Please wait in my room. I am going to get you some water.” Byleth nodded and made her way into the bedroom, taking a seat on the bed to wait for Seteth to return. She could hear the sink in the kitchen running, and the footsteps against the hardwood floors as Seteth returned to the bedroom. “Here you go.” Byleth accepted the glass and took a small sip. Her throat was ragged from crying, so the water felt good as it went down.

“Thank you,” she said. “I’m sorry if I woke you.”

“You did, but that hardly matters right now. Are you alright, Byleth?” She shook her head, no. 

“I uh...I read the cards from Flayn and Claude. I realized that I didn’t tell my dad that I loved him before he died. I didn’t want to make that mistake with you.”

“I...see.” Byleth took note that Seteth had not yet returned her affections, however, he had just been woken at three in the morning. Seteth clasped his hands together between his legs. 

“I, uh...I signed the leave form. I will take it in on Monday. You were right, I need some time to rest and grieve properly. I haven’t been sleeping, and I have neglected my self care. I’ve...I’ve never felt like this before. It’s strange...and uncomfortable. Painful, even.”

“Byleth, I think that perhaps a grief counselor might do you some good. I can recommend a few that work out of the hospital, or perhaps even a private practice or two.” Byleth gave the possibility some thought. 

“Yeah...I think you’re right. I need to talk with a professional about this. I can’t shoulder it all on you and Claude. That’s not fair to you guys.” She finished her water and set the glass aside, leaning on her boyfriend’s shoulder. Seteth’s arm came up to wrap around her, rubbing up and down her arm comfortingly. “May I…” she cleared her throat. “May I stay here tonight?”

“Of course you may. If you hadn’t asked, I would have insisted.” Byleth nodded and closed her eyes, her muscles relaxing at last.

“May I also take a quick shower?” she asked after a few minutes. “I feel gross.”

“Absolutely. I will get you a towel and you may borrow some of my pajamas if you wish.” Byleth opened her eyes and smiled at him--truly smiled for the first time in two weeks. 

“Thank you, Set…” she muttered. Several minutes they sat together on the edge of his bed. Eventually, Byleth stood and went into Seteth’s en suite to clean herself. As promised, he brought her a towel and a spare set of pajamas (just a GMU t-shirt that was much too large and flannel pants that she had to tie extra tight to get them to stay up). Toweling off her hair, she returned to the bedroom and crawled into bed next to Seteth, who was reading a book.

“Better?” he asked quietly. Byleth nodded and curled up next to him. Seteth set aside his book and turned off the light on the nightstand, then pressed a kiss to Byleth’s hair. As her breathing slowed, and her eyes shut, Seteth held her closer and whispered, “I love you too.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That is the end of Palpitations! Thank you again for reading all the way through, it means the world to me. 
> 
> I wanted to take a moment to talk about mental health. As someone suffering from depression and anxiety on a daily basis, I can understand just how hard it is to reach out and ask for help when you're struggling. I am not a professional, nor do I claim to know any more than anyone else on the matter. However, if you are struggling with your mental health, fatalist thoughts, or other, please know that you are loved and you are not alone. 
> 
> https://www.mentalhealth.gov/ is an excellent resource for finding support groups, help, and other forms of assistance.
> 
> However, if you need immediate help the suicide hotline number is 1-800-273-8255. You are loved, you are worth it. 
> 
> Now, for a much happier topic! Currently in the Interest Check Phase is an UNOFFICIAL SETLETH ZINE!!! (YAAY) If you are interested in seeing this project come to life, please consider filling out the interest check form? Link is below. Thank you!
> 
> https://twitter.com/setlethzine (the interest check and any updates are on our Twitter!)

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guess what. 
> 
> It's not over yet. 
> 
> Yeah, I'm terrible. 
> 
> Kudos and Comments give me life and keep me going. Please consider leaving one?


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